From my perspective, I have a knack for helping others to the detriment of myself. I bestow upon them love, power, strength. I edify their souls and provide solace and comfort, sharing the anointing of love. And then, and then! No recognition of this is made that they appreciate. Sound familiar?
This happens, to everyone, I guess, maybe women especially give to men who expect such generosities and exigencies as their right and due. And sometimes, God help them if the men don't get it! Regardless of the "rightness" or "fairness" because it is not right or fair, there is a transference that occurs. To stand up, some stand on the heads of others crushing them down, ignoring them, not appreciating the blessing the individual has been to them. In the process the victim is sucked downward, his or her being darkening as the other reaches into the light.
For the one smashed and crashed into the fallow earth to join the worms, it is an unbearable experience that cries out for some morsel or grain of sustenance to be given by the crusher. Anything...a particle of dust. But often the dust is only in the dry mouth of the "obliterated" who is starved and drained. From the depths of my being, I understand this because it has happened to me on more than one occasion. And from the depths of my soul, I've cried out to God, "Enough." I guess the song, "If I hold my peace, and let the Lord fight my battles, victory will be mine." was the MO I followed. Hmm. Now, I tend to open my mouth, if I can or leave/ the poisoned creature to stew in its own formaldehyde because such behavior is death-filled.
This transference process is happening all over the world by the way. A metaphor for the economics and politics of the class system which is very much alive burgeoning, in fact. The wealthy live to squash into the brown earth those of the same skin tones. Does their blood, the infeebled's, blood not cry out to God? Oh, I forgot. They are the tribal heathen. The Caucasian male imperialists (fast becoming a minority) who now use globalism to expand their empires, are more righteous because money is righteousness and truth. (They used to use Biblical scriptures and their "notion" of God, until many realized who the true hypocritical heathen were.) You can pay to reverse/eliminate/wipe out truth, you know. History books are filled with the vacuation of truths that publishers can believe in.
So the sonnet, though intensely individual for me at the time of the church scandals in May of 1987, applies to many whose blood screams out at injustice and cruelty where generosity and love have been given without a smidgeon of acknowledgement in return.
My blood screams piercing through the universe,
"The debt be paid, the debt you owe to me!"
Those stolen coverings from me dispersed,
To gain the Kingdom Son's authority.
The Pain, the curse on me allowed you to
Enjoy prosperity and favored love,
While I abused and tortured, defamed, too,
Took sin whilst you looked Godly as His Dove.
The price I've paid for you to gain His Rod,
In recompense from you must be returned.
So all your harlot boasts I overtrod
To gain all riches that my blood has earned.
Christ's debts must be fulfilled by sufferings, yours!
I'll shine forth Jesus' Glory as you're cursed!
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